Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Interview ★ Thierry Adler

1. What’s your favorite color?

T: I thought we were here to talk about magic.
Me: Just answer the question, Thierry. Damn.
T: Fuck, I dunno. Blue or something? Who cares?
Me: *sighs*

2. What weapons do you carry on you at all times?

T: A hunting knife. It’s spelled.
Me: Oh yeah? What’s it do?
T: Finds its way back to me. No matter what.
Me: That’s it?
T: It also self sharpens.
Me: Oh. I guess that’s handy.
T: What’s really handy is when I took a plane back home. I threw the knife in the trash at the airport, and wouldn’t you know, when I got to the hotel in Galway, it was already in my bag. It can’t be lost. 
Me: Damn. That’s pretty cool.
T: Yup.

3. What do you do for a living?

T: Why ask me that? You already know.
Me: It’s for the blog.
T: *mocks me slightly*
     *makes a bad Have Tools, Will Travel… joke that I won’t repeat here.*
Okay, okay. I’ve worked at a steel mill, as a handyman, a waiter, as a consultant for the police. Now I help people with supernatural problems. Freelance work. It pays pretty good actually.
Me: You forgot one.
T: I may have taken Tess’ place for a month or so after...
*clears his throat*
Me: Doing what?
T: Shit for the Quorum. I can’t talk about it.
Me: Is it true the Witches are worse than the Council?
T: They're both assholes.
Me: Who’s worse?
T: *shrugs* it depends on what they want.

4. How do you feel about your father?

T: That’s a dirty trick, Avrin.
     Next question.

5. Who’s your best friend?

T: Vaytos, prolly. Can my familiar be my best friend? 
Me: *laughs*
T: What?
Me: That’s the same thing Tess said.
T: *rubs his face and covers his eyes*
Me: You okay?
T: *looks at me with a dead expression*
Next question.

6. Tell me a cool spell you wrote yourself. 

T: *rubs hands together*
     Okay, this only works in the Undertow.
    *gets up and pulls me along with him*
Me: Hey, I don’t want to go to the Undertow, I just straightened my hair.
T: Too late.
    *He Pulses and drags me along with him.*
Me: *I wretch and feel dizzy when we land in the barren wasteland that is also known as the Undertow, a world between worlds. Nothing grows here and it’s always raining. Rain is falling and the straightener is rinsed right out of my hair.*
Dammit Thierry, this hairstyle took me two hours to blow out!
T: Don’t be such a girl. You ready?
Me: Ready for what?
T: My spell, genius.
Me: Oh yeah. Go ahead.
T: *he stoops over a patch of mud and holds his hand over it. His eyes glow bright blue. After a few seconds, a tiny green stem pops out of the ground*
Me: What? I didn’t write that.
T: Haha. Surprised?
Me: Yeah. How’d you learn to do that?
T: I just wished there was something here that reminded me of home, and one day, something grew. Crazy, huh?
Me: *nods*
        Can we go back now? It’s freezing here.
T: *He takes my hand and we Pulse back to our home dimension.*

7. Ever wish you had a girlfriend?

T: *scowls*
Me: Why not?
T: Why do you think?
Me: Fair enough. But do you think Io is hot?
T: She’s alright.
Me: So there’s nothing between you two?
T: *gets visibly irritated*
     No. What’s your angle?
Me: Damn, T-Cup, I’m just asking. It’s an interview, you're supposed to tell people shit they don’t know.
T: Okay, Avvie Bear, do you ever wish you had a boyfriend?
Me: No, not really. Boyfriends get on my nerves.
T: Okay then, we’re even.
    You don’t think whatshisname is hot?
Me: Who is whatshisname?
T: Don’t play dumb.
Me: I’m not. The only man in my life is Francois, and he’s a vacuuming robot. 
T: *laughs*

8. Who do you look up to?

T: anyone taller than me, like everybody else.
Me: ha. 
      *rolls eyes*

9. Are you trying to be hard to interview, or is it just happening?

T: It’s just happening.
Me: *snickers*

10. Tell me something I don’t know about you.

T: *pretends to think*
    I keep a diary. Well, a journal. Journal sounds more manly than diary, don’t you think?
Me: Oh really? What does it say?
Me: Okay, next question.

11. Ever think you’ll find yourself in a jail cell again? 

T: Yeah, probably. I don’t mind though. It’s like a vacation.
Me: I don’t think you're supposed to think of jail in a favorable way.
T: Well, it is. Nobody is constantly calling me asking me to do stuff. I can sleep in. It’s pretty nice.
Me: *makes a face*

12. Anything you want to tell your ‘fans’?

T: Hey?
Me: Okay, don’t hurt yourself being friendly.
T: Look, I gotta go. I’ll see you later, Avrin. Uh... bye-bye blog people. 
Me: M’kay. Peace.
      *Calls after him*
    Hey, try to stay alive, I’m thinking there might be a sequel… eventually.
T: There can’t be a sequel if you never finish the first book. Go write.
    *Flashes me a smile and leaves*


  1. That was hilarious! And interesting, too!
    Sorry for the "anonymous". Tried to Post it as Yorgos KC from WordPress but didn't accept it. ��


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